Banish the Fear

Okay, so here it is. Yet one more new blog out there in cyber world. Why should you spend your time reading mine? I’m hoping you might find what I have to say interesting. Perhaps entertaining. Maybe even useful.

I’m a writer. And my goal for this blog is to do just that. Write.

I have been writing creatively at least since high school—a long time ago. I tried stories, poems, plays, personal essays. But even before that I can remember vivid, imaginative play with my sisters, my toys. I would play out stories in my head before going to sleep at night.

I love stories. Reading them and writing them. It’s part of who I am at the deepest level. My mother has always been an avid reader. I have also always loved reading, though I’ve never been as fast a reader as my mother, or my sisters.

Through college, I didn’t find as much time to read for the simple pleasure of reading. And my creative endeavors focused mainly on short pieces such as really bad poetry and questionable short stories. I even wrote a short story for my final paper in my Russian history class. I scored an A for the course, so I must have done okay.

Sometime after college, when life became a mere existence from one paycheck to the next, I began to write my first novel. I bought a new computer and set up a writing space. I subscribed to magazines and bought books on writing. I had all these ideas in my head and I was going to be a writer!

I played around with words. I wrote my novel. Half of it at least. Then I started to rewrite it. The novel foundered, and I have yet to finish that first one.

I got married. Started a family. My writing took a back seat. A really back, back seat.

Then, about six years ago, I was holding a tiny human in my arms and thinking about what sort of legacy I might be leaving for my son. A box full of unfinished stories. An imagination left inactive. I feared that’s what it would be. And I wasn’t okay with that.

Why then has it taken me so long to really get started with my writing? A very good question. I suppose it was fear. Insecurity. Lack of faith in myself and what I have to offer.

The lack of faith and insecurities are still there. I still don’t know that I have anything of value to offer my readers, but I’m hopeful. More than anything else I intend to write for myself. I will share what little I know about writing, what I’ve learned from my own reading and my experiences. I will share some book reviews as I can, and I do hope at some point to share my fiction.

And the fear? I’ve decided to banish the fear. It’s useless, and a waste of time. No one likes what I have to say? I’m okay with that. I will tell my truth. I will share my view of the world. I will give it my best. I won’t hold back.

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One thought on “Banish the Fear

  1. Pingback: Chasing a Dream: A Year in Review – TAwrites

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